Hipster Baby on Board

I hate the word hipster.

Mostly because I think it’s overused. No, actually, I KNOW it’s overused. These days it feels like anyone who owns a pair of glasses are called hipster. I recently had to get a pair myself because apparently staring at computer screens for 90% of your day is bad for the eyes… or something. Almost every time I wear my glasses people ask me if they are real. By “real” they are actually wondering if they’re prescription or not (unless they are hallucinating). My glasses aren’t exactly what I would call “hipster.” I think they fit my face well, which is why I bought them (gasp). However, I feel like there are so many kinds of glasses that people unfairly put into the “hipster” category. If your glasses are round: hipster. If they are overly large: hipster. If they have any shape that was around in the 1950s: hipster. If the list of glasses that are considered hipster is longer than the non-hipster list, then there is something wrong with that.

This isn’t something that happens solely with glasses either. Shoes, backpacks, bikes, even the kind of music people listen to. I once heard someone say Lena Dunham was a hipster because she is a feminist and often speaks her mind. Also, partly because of the way she dresses and her tattoos. Well I have tattoos and I once took a women’s studies class so I guess I am hipster after all!

I swear if you’re a boy and dress well then you are S.O.L. because you’re doomed to be called hipster no matter what. It’s not only used to describe people wearing suspenders and donning handlebar mustaches anymore. You wear a vest? Hipster. Dress shoes? Hipster. Someone once described a light grey plaid suit at Dolce & Gabbana as hipster-chic and I barfed in my mouth. Nothing about a luxury fashion house is hipster.

Hipster is a label people like to put on others that do things differently than them. People think they sooo funny because they can critique things they disagree with. Oftentimes, at least here in California, it’s used almost as an insult. Instead of actually saying “I think your glasses are stupid” people just say they are hipster and think we don’t know what they mean by it. I once made a comment about Birkenstocks and someone said they are hipster sandals. I think the word you are going for is “hippy.” I even heard someone refer to Trader Joes as hipster. A grocery store is hipster? Can food be hipster? Children?? Let’s try to find some boundaries here…

I went to college in Portland, Oregon, which is home to some of the quirkiest people in the world. “Keep Portland Weird” bumper stickers are on most of the cars and just about everyone is an activist. There is an annual naked bike ride through the city that they actually shut down streets for. Yup, naked people on bikes. Based on California’s standards, everyone in Portland would be a hipster. In fact, it’s always on the top 5 list of hipster cities, which have been created by Huffington Post and Forbes, along with countless other publications. In Portland people like quality coffee, art, and it has a large farmer’s market. All things that make it hipster (apparently).

No city wants to be deemed “hipster,” especially when it’s hardly considered a compliment. No person wants to be called hipster. Can we just stop saying it altogether?

You can’t just call everything hipster because then nothing is hipster, you know what I mean? I’m sure I’m not the first person to point this out, but I can’t help but complain because I hear the word so many times a week it makes my head spin.

Anyway, I’m going to go put on my hipster clothes and hipster glasses, get in my hipster car with my “hipster baby on board” sign and drive to the hipster grocery store to get my hipster hummus.



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